25 June 2009

Internet

I think the internet is too much for me.

Too much news. I can read the headlines everyday, with new ones popping up moment by moment. I can click on links to related articles. I can learn all kinds of things about all kinds of people in all kinds of situations. But then I do nothing about it. There is no outlet for so much information except mere opinion. So I can leave comments, or click thumbs up and down, or post the item framed with my own view. And then do nothing. Do nothing but wait until the next item rolls around. Do nothing but grow cynical, frustrated, or feel cheap, empty victories for "having my voice be heard."

Too much entertainment. I can drop by Hulu and laugh at Conan's monologues and general silliness, or check out the latest YouTube clip for a chuckle. I can forget that there are very important things happening which ought not happen. I can forget there is evil.

Too much photography. I can log in to Facebook and scan through the photos of my friends, see countless self-portraits at odd angles with faces frozen in rock star screams or Zoolander pouts or eyebrow arches. I can see beautiful face and beautiful face, curvy figure after curvy figure, and skin skin skin on "innocent" sites. And then there are too many faces in my mind and I forget the faces that really matter to me. I forget the innocence of a flesh-and-blood smile. I forget the good, good hardship of a living person and grow more comfortable with the static flat image. Or I grow angry that people think so little of their smiles, their eyes, their bodies, that they would paint them and alter them into meaningless charms.

Too much text. Words, werds, wurds. Too many words sitting open-faced, as if every one of those words and ideas were as important as every other. One man's blog is another man's comment. I can look from page to page, blog to blog, listening to the voices speak through their words--and at the end of the day, I can believe that someone's words matter more because their well-designed website looks much cooler than the other. I can disregard a friend and read an enemy. I can lie. But I cannot pronounce truth in so much text. All is opinion. All is equal.

Too much music. Too much video. Too much sound. Too much fury.

And not enough of the things that really matter.

Am I alone in this?

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